So much to write about but I’m in the moment right now. In the moment with my shoes off, socks a little stuffy smelling, feet pulled up in my chair crossed legged. Some how with my shoes off I think more clearly. It’s a down day again. I had a brief happy moment the other day with the boys on the tire swing. But even being in Walmart brought on anxiety and stress. The pit of my stomach aching and was only worsened by attending a religious event with 100’s of people. ARG! The thought works me up again. But right now at my desk I sit with my shoes off, feet semi free, I can close my eyes and imaging walking barefoot in the spring grass. You know, when it is green and full but the ground makes it cool and refreshing. mmm…. How is it that my feet and my mind are so connected? Shoes on me feet stifles my brain. My brain is so tired. I’m fighting so hard to get well. This is the hardest I can ever remember trying to get well. I almost crave a manic moment to laugh, to enjoy to not ache, to not feel pain. I know that’s not good. I want clarity. I want to be whole again not just temporarily but completely for all times. So until then, I’ll slip my shoes off, feel the cold tile on the bottom of my feet, and feel all warm inside…clear headed for a brief moment…slipping my shoes off!